Communicating across genders

I found my cause - but now I need help

Every New Year I make a list of resolutions. Some of them are the same but every now and again I'll add in something new. The thing about New Year's Resolutions is that I don't think anyone ever makes them with a plan in mind to actually accomplish them.

It's always a wish list :

• This year I'm going to shape up, lose weight, GET BUFF
• I'm going to get a better job, get promoted, tell my boss just how it's gonna be
• Save money, travel (By the way - the 2 are practically impossible to do at the same time)

Of course I made all of the above... but like I said before - occasionally I'll add in something new. This year I vowed to run a marathon for a good cause and this is one resolution I am going to see through.

I have signed up with the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society's Team in Training program. Over the next four months, I will be working with seasoned coaches and mentors and others like myself who want to do something great to raise money for blood cancer research and train for a marathon.

I have chosen to participate in the Rock n' Roll Marathon in San Diego scheduled for May 31st. I'm running in honor of 2 little local heroes Eli Crowley (age 4) and Zachary Moore. I have a lot of work ahead of me. Not only must I physically prepare myself but I'll also have to throw my shoulders back, hold my head up and campaign for funds during this time of economic hardship. My minimum goal for the event I have chosen is $4100 and I don't have much time.

I know it's possible ... but I will need help. If you read this and are able to Make a Donation please do so. If you are not able to, then please, at least pass this on to those who you think might be able to.

Blood cancer research is a very important cause. I appreciate you for taking the time to read this and possibly pass it on to those who might help me support this cause.

If you can, please Donate Here.

Amused

I astounded myself today. I actually used the phrase, "Ain't that some shit!" in everyday speak. I don't think that sentence would have ever been part of my repertoire had I not grown up in South Carolina :)

Inauguration Nation

So good it'll make you cry... Well sign me up!

I like to have at least one interesting thought per day. I was lucky enough to make my interesting thought quota on my way to work this morning, so everything else from here on out is surplus – Whew! That really takes the pressure off.

I was listening to the local morning radio show (2 girls and a guy). They were rating movies and one lady mentioned a movie the other lady has not yet seen.

“Is it any good?” she asks in her token I’ve-got-a-raspy-radio/smoker’s-voice voice. (Oh so sexy) “It’s soooo good. It’ll make you cry though.”

Huh?!?!

Now here’s the thing. I have said this… and I have heard other people (women mostly) say this too. “Oh it’s soooo good … it’ll make you cry! – Go watch it go watch it.” In reality this makes absolutely NO SENSE. Since when are tears a selling point for anything?

“Hey, do you think that guy would make a good boyfriend?”
“Oh yeah! Soooo good. He’ll make you cry though.”

HECK YES!

Miss, Depression doesn't look good on me, can I try on something that's more me?

The title says it all. I'm depressed but I am approaching my current state of mind with a very clinical and somewhat cynical eye. "What is wrong with you?" I ask myself. There must be some 1 thing that has driven me to my current "Can I just sleep for five more days Mom" mentality.

Do you know how some people get depressed and it's almost like it ... suits them? They come out of it having lost weight from lack of appetite. I'm not that person at all. Number one my depression is lasting. First I get upset from the situation and then I get upset with myself for getting depressed and eating everything in my house - such as an entire jar of cocktail olives in one night, a box of mac and cheese and good Lord help me if I happen to have hershey's chocolate syrup in my fridge.

Since Christopher moved to Miami, we have lost touch with just who exactly the other person is. When there was a physical closeness between the two of us, other things seemed to come somewhat easier - such as the much needed emotional connection. Yet now that he is gone, and has been gone since September 08, I can't seem to muster any feelings of love toward him because I feel abandoned.

Over the Christmas and New Year's holiday, my little brother, Coda, went through a pretty traumatic experience which landed him in the hospital for more than a couple of weeks and really had my family worried. Coda is a major part of my life and I had to be strong for him and for my mom but when it came time to be at home I really needed some help being strong. I asked Christopher to come to Charleston but he didn't. He had his fair share of words of ridicule for my little brother for getting hurt in the first place but he couldn't seem to muster any words of compassion and support. This may be the end. I feel like his actions are completely unacceptable.

all hail the liquid of the Gods, save me from pups in puberty

It’s the beginning of a new week and there are so many changes. This is my first week without Christopher in what will be our next year to 2 years of ‘Living Long Distance.”

I was awfully sad most of Saturday as I watched him do his last minute packing. Then I was overjoyed when he said he would stay for just one more night and leave Sunday morning. So we dinnered together and talked and laughed and cuddled and everything was great. But Sunday came all too soon and of course he had to go.

He started his new job this morning and from what I can tell, it is going to keep him mighty busy. He hasn’t had the opportunity to clue me in on what his first impressions of the people are as of yet. However, Christopher is very much unlike me. It takes me a bit of time to get over a bad first impression, whereas he is no where near as judgmental. (We are living proof that opposites do attract).

I made a pact with myself that I would not mope while he was away and that I would try to be as active as possible. Therefore, when I got my 5:37 a.m. wake up call, I did my best to spring out of bed – although if there had been any witnesses, they would call it a slither. I took out the huge load of trash that me, Christopher and our roommate W accumulated on our island in the kitchen over the weekend and I took the pup for a walk.

I am such a good mother, right?

But boy is he frustrating when I haven’t had much sleep and it’s still within the hours of 5 and 6 in the morning. I may have to buy a coffee pot for the house because I think it’s pretty fair to say that I should never have to confront a beagle mix in the early morning hours until I have had at least cup o’ caffeine.

He stops and sniffs and tinkles – no poo. Stops, sniffs and tinkles. This progresses until eventually he is just propping up his leg on everything even though nothing is coming out. BUT STILL no poo – which makes me feel really bad because I know that I’m going to have to crate him up for a good 8 hours with no potty break because I work 45 minutes away from home sweet home. I say he brought it on himself and maybe he’ll learn in the future that mommy doesn’t have an hour and a half to wander around aimlessly in front of our apartment complex in my shorty pajamas just because he is having performance anxiety.

The day was definitely off to a shaky start but thankfully it started looking up after I took my first sip of my overpriced java.

Now, I just have to get passed the fact that it only 2:30, I don’t get out of work until 4, but every time I look at the clock on 3 minutes have passed.